Phase Two (Getting in Shape)

Today, I began "Phase Two" of  my goal to get in shape and lose thirty before I'm thirty! I've come a long way on this journey already which began in September. Phase one, I focused on my eating habits only. I may do a few posts giving tips about how I got to where I am now. I can't believe I am within just a few pounds of my goal weight, but it's not really about the number anymore!

I want to be strong and healthy for me, my hubby, and my three growing boys! I want them to see a woman making good choices and overcoming things that once seemed impossible. They need it as much as I do.

As part of my goal, I've decided to run in a local race that has sort of always been on my "bucket list," - Bloomsday! It's just over 7 miles, something I've never done, and it's got a killer hill that everyone calls "doomsday hill." I'm up to the challenge, and it will give me something to keep going and striving for.

My husband has also agreed to run it with me, which frankly will be a breeze for him. He ran track and cross country in college and high school, but it will be nice to have the support and the company. I know he'll have to hold back, there's no way I'll be able to run it in any sort of competitive time, but that's not what it's about, after all!

A few weeks ago, I got these awesome new running shoes! Who would have thought that Skechers makes some decent training shoes? They are so comfortable, and I love the hot pink! Totally empowering!

I went on my first training run this evening just before the sun went down. Just a short one, a little over one mile... but I am already feeling it! I have a lot of work to do! The weather was decent, still cold, but good for running, low forties. My lungs didn't appreciate it, though. I can still feel the cold down in my chest. My husband tells me it will go away with more practice, and my lungs will get stronger.

I have about four months to train for the race, which is the first Sunday in May. I am hoping to slowly add miles to my practice runs, and be able to get in a few long 7 mile runs before then!

Day one down... many more to go!!!

What is The World's Story About? Thoughts about My Grandma's Life and Passing

                                                                Barbara Jane Millar
                                                     
                                                              ("Grandma Millar")

         "A child may ask. "What is the world's story about?" And a grown man or woman may wonder, "What way will the world go? How does it end, and while we're at it, what's the story about?"
          "I believe that there is one story in the world, and only one, that has frightened and inspired us so that we live in a Pearl White serial of continuing thought and wonder. Humans are caught- in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too- in a net of good and evil.I think this is the only story we have and that it occurs on all levels of feeling and intelligence. Virtue and vice were warp and woof of our first consciousness, and they will be the fabric of our last, and this despite any changes we may impose on field and river and mountain, on economy and manners. There is no other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have only the hard, clean questions : Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well-or ill?"

                                        John Steinbeck- East of Eden

               No one can really say it better than Steinbeck. I guess when someone dies, I always find myself thinking about life and those hard, clean questions. What is the point? Why are we here? Are we making a difference? Is it for good?
              My Grandma wasn't just someone who died, she was my Grandma. I didn't know everything about her, but her hard questions, I think can be answered easily, though they really aren't for me to answer. I remember her mostly as a storyteller. She loved to sit around and talk about people, usually people I didn't know, but they were her people. I think she loved people more than I ever knew. I also think she touched more lives than I will ever know. She had her master's in education... I guess you could say little people were her specialty.
             But to me, the best thing that she gave this world, was my mom. And because of that. I know my Grandma must have been brilliant. My mom is anything, but ordinary, and some of that must have come from my Grandma.  She is kind and ambitious. She does the impossible ten times over. She is humble and generous, a tower of strength and a refuge whenever I need her.  She is the queen of resourcefulness (never buy anything, she tells me, I might have it already, or if not, I can probably make it)! My mom can make anything... out of nothing! I've always thought she could have chosen any profession and succeeded, but she chose the most humble, and in many ways the most important- just like her mom- a teacher! Where would we be without teachers? However, my mom isn't a regular teacher, and I have to assume that my Grandma wasn't either. The impact left of students will never leave, and in that way, somewhere out in the world my Grandma is still with us through the changes she left on the lives of others.
           My Grandma was many things, some of which I am still learning and hearing new stories! I think she would have liked getting to know her grand kids more. We got to see her on a "good" day a few weeks before she passed. She was in the hospital for a UTI, and I just had this feeling that we needed to stop by with some flowers. The boys helped me pick some out (cheerful purple gerbera daisies) and we were able to deliver them to her room. She was awake and in a happy mood when we came in. She didn't know who we were, but was still glad for the company. I sat with her and helped her eat her lunch. She told me funny stories that must have been about her own kids. I think she was remembering or thinking it was back then, instead of the present time.  She was talking about behavior issues and how important it is to keep those kids in line! She made me laugh several times during that visit, and she shared a smile with me too. I got to tell her that I loved her, and I will never forget that day.
          What is the world's story about? I think it is about moments like that one with my Grandma. That last light in her eyes, a smile of innocence and genuineness, and good, moments filled with so much good and love.
           I am going to end my thoughts about Grandma, with the following quote. We forget the simplicity of life and it's purpose sometimes, and I think this is fitting:

          "Child, though I am meant to teach you much,
           what is it, in the end,
            except that together we are
           meant to be children
           of the same Father,
           and I must unlearn
           all the adult structure
           and the cumbering years
           and you must teach me
           to look at the earth and the heaven
           with your fresh wonder."
                                          -Jane Tyson Clement

I wish I had the right words to say about her. I wish I could be more of a comfort to my mom, who I know is missing her so much. All I know, is that now she finally has peace and rest. You are loved, Grandma.